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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24316429">let grow</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/shudder/pseuds/shudder'>shudder</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bones (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Post-Season/Series 03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 04:20:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>441</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24316429</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/shudder/pseuds/shudder</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Zack realizes he will never have Hodgins.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Zack Addy/Jack Hodgins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>let grow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It starts slowly. Someone might never even notice it was happening at first, not unless it was the only thing they had to focus on. It was the only thing Zack had to focus on.</p><p>First, the pain of realization. The way his chest tightened after Hodgins left, how the tears welled up in his eyes. He told himself that this was normal, that he gets choked up every time. Somehow, even from the very beginning, he knew it wasn't normal. The chest pain never went away, never dulled. He found it difficult to catch his breath, and somehow he knew it was related to Hodgins. He had heard that chest tightness wasn't uncommon when a person fell for someone they could never have. He couldn't ever have Hodgins, not after everything he had put him through, not after being locked up like this. So he brushed it off. Love comes and goes.</p><p>But as time goes on, it gets worse. He stopped being able to speak, he could feel something in his lungs, something sharp, thorny. He tried calling out for medical attention, but no sound came out, just a single rose petal. He coughed for hours, more and more petals coming up. His breath only came in short bursts, filling his lungs maybe once every twenty seconds, before an onslaught of petals. Soon, his cell was lined with them, and if he hadn't been bedridden and prone from the pain, he would've been ankle deep in dead roses. </p><p>The last part can be avoided, but only with the object of affection's love. Hodgins would never give him that. Truly unrequited love is rare, usually there's at least a glimmer of hope to be attained. After that last time, however, Zack could be sure that his love was hopeless. He wasn't going to get better. He cried toward the end. Real, heaving sobs. He had kept it in for so long, weeks in his cell with nothing but three square meals and a pile of rose petals, and he hadn't even shed a tear. But when he started feeling the plants growing into his throat, he couldn't help it. His time was over. He took his last few breaths, as the thorns dug themselves into his soft tissue, the roses blooming out of his nose and mouth. They would find him the next day, he knew, when he didn't touch his food. And they'd find him with "Hodgins" written on the wall next to him in his own blood. A testament to his love, to his loyalty. </p><p>It was a slow process, but it always ended the same way. </p><p>Alone.</p>
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